Enough

Google search "do we expect to much from moms?" The results vary from "Do moms expects too much of their kids, husbands, schools, or doctors, do mother in laws expect too much from their sons and daughters, do children expect too much money." Not one hit in the first three pages answered my query. As a society do we expect too much from mothers. As the search results reflects the questions is not a common one.

My Grandma has commented many times on my countless undertakings as a mother. She says I try too hard. As she puts it "all I ever did was what the doctor or my mother told me to." Her other favorite "all the problems I tried to solve were about me." In her time the focus was on the mother and her convenience (if only to free up more of her time to devote it to her husband). Solid food was started early to induce better sleep. Early weening was common and seen as good. There was no cry it out debate to be had. You sent your kid to the closest school, or the school affiliated with your church if you could afford it. You bought the vegetables at the store and didn't think about where they came from. You plopped the kids in front of the television without a second though.


Contrast that with current expectations. Todays good moms leave their baby and me yoga classes with junior strapped into a Moby Wrap, all ready for the walk to the local co-op for organic veggies. Then head home to make homemade baby food, if the infant is at least six months old. Breastfeeding will continue day and night for a minimum of a year, but it is not so inconvenient because baby is always close by at night because she is part of the family bed. Long deliberations will be made over wether older children should watch educational dvd's. Hours will be spent reviewing medical research on vaccines. Enriching activities and healthy snacks will be prepared for play dates. Every school and daycare in the city will be evaluated before a decision is made. This is only the beginning.

Starting before conception the pressure to be an ideal mother is continually growing, the bar is perpetually being raised and I for one can not reach any higher.